The Best of Today

Don't ask what the meaning of life is. You define it.

I'll Find Me

It was an old photograph. I’d been staring at her now for what had felt like hours. The iconic photograph was taken in my 23^rd year, wearing that quintessential white gown, bright genuine smile, and waving to the crowds. It was my wedding day. And I remember that day as if it was yesterday. Now 30 years later, and staring at this image of myself I could still feel the weight and soft fabric of the dress, the piercing stares of the guests in the cathedral, and orchestral music playing the background as I slowly strolled down that red carpet…

In the 30 years that have now passed, so much of my life had changed, more importantly so had I. My marriage to the Prince was the very start. It not only marked the official status of my commencement into my (now then) husbands Royal Family, it was the dawn of unfathomable media scrutiny. “Fat Porky Pork”, “Silly Willy”, “Naïve and Oblivious”, were just a few of the ever turning headlines that took publish. Although every single one of my family members, friends, and officials took to my defense to protect me it wasn’t enough to keep journalists from degrading. As both hurtful and humiliating those titles media had named, what’s worse is that I believed every single one of them. 

In the early stages of my new life, I made every attempt to convince myself that all this negative attention was just the small hole of it. Eventually it would all fade, and I’d be able to continue with my personal life. But at the time, it became so daunting that it began to reflect on my attitude towards my own self – on the inside and out. The “Live with absolutely no regret” motto I’d lived by in all of those teen years had suddenly disappeared. While on the outside I was all smiles, on the inside I was hurting deeply. It became so cumbrous that it eventually took towards my marriage.

My husband and I decided to part ways when I was 33, 10 years after we made our vows that we’d be together till our death. While many were left in confusion about our separation, he and I knew it would be for the better. Over the years, our relationship had grown apart. While we still very much love each other, we both agreed that there was no longer any purpose for us to continue being together. Regardless, the divorce ended on mutual terms. And to this day we still keep in contact and care deeply for each other. Though it is out of love and respect for the person, and not necessarily as “husband and wife”. As one who’s departed from the Royal Family, everyone is still so generous in ensuring that I’m able to live a well off life and have that ability to be provided for myself without hesitation. 

When I was much younger I read a saying by Marilyn Monroe, “I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.” And in the darkness I had lived in for many years, I not once thought to look back at that. I could say that I regret not looking back at it, but as said by Marilyn – Everything happens for a reason.

In referring back to what I said about being all smiles on the outside, at that time I believe I had an addiction. It is not the tangible addiction like alcohol or by drugs. It’s a much more thought provoking addiction I had went through. Which I truly believe was the cause of my distress. Thirsty people need water, hungry people need food, cold people need warmth, and rejected people need acceptance. I was addicted to acceptance. It was the answer to why I was so easily hurt by the ridicule I received from the press. All those who I loved continuously aided in stating to the public that I was not at all like what you read. Eventually people believed it. The downside – I didn’t. 

I had no clue as to who I was and what was going to make me happy. I felt absolutely worthless. Over the years of this long journey, I learned that self worth is NOT measured by the square footage of your home, nice clothes, and money. When we search for "ourselves" in the eyes of others, we have imprisoned our own-selves in believing that our self-worth is nothing unless others validate who we are. Unless we approve of whom we are, what we are, and what we are capable of doing as an individual, only then we will have released "us" from our own imprisonment. We are in charge of our own life's destiny and what we do and become can only be validated by our accomplishments and failures; not by what others may think of us. (Dahveed)

…  In looking at the young woman in the picture I hold. I say quietly to her – You are an incredible woman. You know who you are. You just didn’t need 30 years to figure it out.

M

Part 2 - Her life and so on....

With her career in communications, she would have a several month stay in the country on behalf of the firm in order to meet and work with numerous clients of theirs. She was career driven, motivated, and passionate about what she was doing in life. Back home she had a quiet life, a nice place of her own, that was independent of her family. Coming from a working class background, she took pride in working hard and dedicating to her goals to meet accomplishments. A great deal of that was instilled in her by her mum and dad. Everything up to that point in her life she had earned, and others were aware of it. Some are even in awe as to how far she’s made it and how quickly since her graduation from a small college. Upon graduation, she was enthusiastic about becoming part of the real world and getting a position for herself. With the right referrals and her own passion, she humbly climbed the hills to success. 

She was a busy working lady. Her career was her baby. And she thoroughly enjoyed every minute of it. Coming to work every day was and had never been a burden. In her case, her professional life was really her only life. She normally withheld from watching television, reading silly magazines (that is, ‘silly’ by her own words), and hearing about the news because from her perspective the reality of chaos in the world took away from her own peaceful reality. Of course she had a wonderful group of friends and family that she spent the time she could with, though everyone who had gotten to know her knew they could never really be as important to her as her job. To some that seemed selfishly career obsessed. Regardless, people respected her and looked up to her. She was considered one of the examples at the offices; hardworking, sophisticated, reliable, and down to earth. Everyone had a warm liking towards her. The few that felt the opposite were often driven by envy and their own self righteousness. Her opposition, without a doubt had to face the defense and vindication of those that cared for her.

… The night of their first encounter, despite the massive gap in social differences and her cluelessness to whom the man really was (she made the assumption he worked in litigation), they both had a genuine and friendly interest in each other. He found her very easy to talk to, and he could tell that she wasn’t talking to him just because of a well-known fact. He was even more delighted to be discussing one another’s motherland. He with this tan skin and native Kiwi accent, and she with her exotic Asian looks and Canadian accent, their cultural differences had made for a very sincere discussion that night.

The woman couldn’t help but notice the looks guests were giving this man. She could sense a few whispers going on about something, although she didn’t bother to give concern because she was seldom busy letting her mind and eyes wander around the lounge décor. The few other strangers settled at the bar at some point suddenly started acting in a jovial manner. And it certainly wasn’t because of the alcohol. It had been as if someone in the room was giving off some sort of strange ambiance simply because of their presence. She knew it was because of him. But what was so special about this guy? Well, setting aside from his magnetic good looks and impeccable style.

M

Song of the Day!

"Gotten" by Slash and Adam Levine

M

Part One - First Impressions

There she was. With both little surprise and slight embarrassment she was staring at her own image. An image captured by some ruthless photographer, which was now published for the entire nation to see in the Daily Newspaper. She wasn’t spectacular, nor that interesting by her belief. So really, why would anyone want to read the paper about a woman who simply sparked a relationship with one of the most eligible (or was before he met her) and prominent male figures in the country?...

Like any normal person on planet earth, they met by chance through mutual friends at a small social gathering. It was one of her male colleagues’ dinner parties celebrating his 27^th birthday. She already knew a few of the other guests well from college, where they shared a few of the same classes and on occasion spent lunch together. One of the few others whom she had just met that night also just happened to be HIM. Their introductions were simple, friendly, and courteous. She never got nervous in meeting other people and her starting conversation was casual.

“How was your week? How do you guys know each other?” You know, the typical discussion and questionnaire the goes about meeting someone new. As she and some others gradually got into knowing the basics of one another, she was blindly unaware of WHO the man she had just met really was. Well, anybody who follows sport would know him.

He was one of his of his nation’s top rugby union players. A sporting hero. Centre position, strength, speed, and agility to boot. Regardless of his domineering 6’3 well built figure, he had a very gentle charisma. Upon shaking his hand, she couldn’t help but be intimidated by his incredibly tall stature. Especially for a young woman who had no choice but to literally look up at him with her 5’4 frame. And if her lacking knowledge of his true successful profession weren’t enough, she was clueless to the fact that he’s one of the highest paid. You’d think a highly intelligent woman would’ve known the status of a man wearing a Bvlgari watch when she saw one. He had money. And lots of it.

M

Music: That which you hear is not what you see

 

*the video above is in full ownership and credit of Tje Austin and Egot Inc. music

After watching his wonderful rendition of Bruno Mars’ “Just the way you are” on NBC’s The Voice, I had to show my respect by making a new post in ode to his wonderful craft and quirky personality. As promised, coming back to the previous entry I had of Tje Austin, I’ve done as much Google-ing to find as much as I could. Turns out he has quite a high following on the internet…

Vocalist and songwriter Tje Austin (pronounced Tye) hails from Austin Texas (Austin and Austin – a cute coincidence haha). In listening to him sing, you’re immediately pulled in by his smooth, warm, organic neo-soul vocals. That which speaks truth and honesty which is such a rarity in today's generation of mainstream music. He caresses the soul and speaks to the heart.

Tje already has a multitude of performances for major names like Trey Songz and Anthony David. And he even sang the national anthem in 2011 for the Texas Rangers. That, which is just a small addition to his already phenomenal internet presence, his Myspace has surpassed over 3 million hits. His Youtube channel displays much of his own work, along with his own renditions of Alicia Keys, Kings of Leon, and Bob Marley.  

Accolades…

1^st album in 2008 “Love Me Knots”

2^nd album in 2010 “Xperience”

3^rd album already released!! “Dreamin’ Big”, includes the single City of Me.

All of these are available on iTunes and Amazon.

“Who I am, moves me to speak about life through my music. What happens to me is happening to someone else, and it is comforting, whether it is good or bad, to know that you are not alone; and this is what my music is about, comfort.” – Tje Austin

M

Tje Austin

"A great voice, is a great voice... Is a great voice" - Adam Levine.

Tje Austin is quite possibly one of the best I've heard. Have a listen... You'll be pleasantly surprised ;)

And here he is again! This time showcasing his talent on The Voice, and rocking the full afro :)

I just found out about him last night when I watched a re-run of The Voice last night. This guy is frickin brilliant. I'll be sure to get back to him on another post. In the meantime, I'm going to have to do some searching to find out more about Tje Austin!

M